I consider myself more dom and I'm particularly very fond of spanking.
Unfortunately I'm lacking partners to spank. Sometimes it's just because they are shy to admit they want to be spanked, other times I feel worried about pushing them into that while they might be interested.
My question for you is how to get some men into being spanked and what are the best possible ways to do that?
MH
Coaxing someone into spanking is much like coaxing someone into doing anything new and exciting. The first thing you need is to gain his trust, then you ease him into it slowly, never pushing him too far too fast. If he warms up to it (not just his ass!), then take it further.
Spanking can be a bit tricky, however, since many of us were spanked as children and that can be a source of hotness for the person being spanked as an adult, or it can be a source of trauma and bad memories that will end a session quickly. You can't often find out before the play session begins which of those extremes you'll be facing, but learning to read body language and verbal cues can clue you in pretty quickly.
If a person had loving parents and a fairly good childhood, then spanking can trigger good feelings. Yes, it hurts, but it wouldn't be happening if the person doing the spanking didn't love and care for me.
If the person had abusive parents, that whole scenario goes south pretty quickly.
Let's assume for now that you've got a guy who isn't going to relive childhood trauma across your lap, and you want to get him into a little ass-slapping. It never hurts to give him a few playful swats on his backside to see how he reacts. If he flinches or tries to move away, it might be best to leave it alone. A slight moan or other positive reaction is probably a good sign to take it further. Keep up the playful swats - nothing that will really sting at all - and continue to judge the reaction. You might even say something like, "have you been a bad boy? Do you need a spanking?" This puts it into role-play, which frees him up to say, "yes" to a spanking. After all, it isn't HIM that wants the spanking, it's the character you've just suggested that he play that wants the spanking. Taking it to "acting" can break the taboo that a lot of guys feel about wanting to be spanked. For some guys, it's like admitting that they're less of a man. Of course, that's bullshit... but it's real to some guys anyway. Give him a role to play and see if he runs with it.
However you decide to initiate it, if you want it to be an erotic time for him (and something he'll want again), start off very lightly. I can't stress this enough. When you spank an ass, the body sends blood to the surface of the skin to toughen it up and protect it from the blows. This is why an ass turns pink, then red. You need enough time with the soft swats to allow this to happen and allow his ass to toughen itself up before you start in with heavier blows. This will do two things: [1] it will increase his stamina and give you a longer session and [2] it will decrease the likelihood that there will be marks or bruises that last more than an hour or two.
Once you've got him to the point of enjoying this treatment, the main thing to remember is to land those swats carefully. Keep them on the part of his ass that has been "warmed up". Once you've gotten to the point of some heavy swats, landing one on skin that hasn't been worked yet will snap him out of it pretty quickly and could easily have him pulling up his britches and heading for the door... with a diminished trust in you. Pay attention and send him home sore, but happy.
By the way, the same applies for any sort of contact play, whether it's spanking, whipping, flogging, whatever. Let the body do its job and give it time to react to the easy strokes before you go full-tilt, then aim carefully.
Daddy Jim
